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Abnormal neck pulsing between breaths all through the breath really surreally so informal taking your time and pissing it away not as how should we say it put it? not as streamlined as before along the lines of flaccid arcs dripping down into the holes spluttering against the plastic before leaking into the holes wandering to the edge in a stream of consciousness along the lines of flaccid arcs dripping down sweat burning a head one is beginning at the nearly finished to believe has never been clear a dream given up on broken promises disillusioned so that's what was in my eye all this pissed away time.
"You should do a better job of checking your sources."
"I'd say I'd keep that in mind, but that's all my brain's been clogged with."
"You'd think you'd learn by now, but you even make matters worse by deleting your posts."
"I'm getting it. I'm just deleting myself."
"Nothing to be spun."
"My spectacles are cleaner than I thought. There's a smear in the air."
"A proctologist and a fan walked into a bar."
"I've heard this one, no wait the proctologist walked in with a follower or the appliance?"
"They were wearing appliances."
"You sure it wasn't an orthodontist?"
"I'm certain. The fixtures were in their other hole."
"Walking arm in arm?"
"Brazen as the day is skid-marked."
"I've heard that one."
"Relentless bastard."
"A blender and a surgeon were riding one of those bicycles with the extra seats."
"Are you referring to spawning families with additional women or the fish?"
"Did you think I said sturgeon? Your ears must be filled after that last dust storm we had."
"A moment of weakness when that last one whirled through here. I considered asking for wishes. I forget how many one gets like it really matters. Weakness it was. Did look like quite a dervish escaping the desert although it just faded blended into this infernal nether just imagined what it might be like to see something anything escaping."
"We've discussed this imagining business."
"Business there was a lot of that getting stuck in my eye."
Two minds of two
associations on both sides
separated by an axis
a fence threaded with razors
chills and scorching
stumbling under the bright sun
clearing one's throat
and swallowing nonsense
chunks clumping
into another illness
feel it coming on
the aches of thoughts
repeating like poison
laced with spoon-fed phrases
- Max Stoltenberg
And after that overly long and unnecessary introduction more like preheating for the customary 6 or so minutes, you think that it might be strange or appropriate to mention or keep to oneself much in the manner of pushing your own face inside out recalling when you were little and would play with your socks and roll them into a fabric donut stop scratching my head making it burn feel like sharp bugs and their hypodermic legs strolling through the thoughts the contemplations that draw blood and try in vain to put it back dried out brush forcing itself upon a wall sucking up to indecision and retractions.
He went into the field where the field used to be to meet with the administrative assistant who was so good at alphabetizing and reversing the direction of time in regards to emails and still managed to get the edges of her nails catching on sweater sleeves fuck hate when that happens and seek absolution in watching slower and slower slow motion videos of water balloons colored liquid holding it together as membranes fail so quickly in the smallest spans returning from the room with the shredder before anyone notices the extra folders missing waited too long to put it down and now it's gone don't think much of it dehydrated conversation burning lips on windows that close doors on the field that used to be.
the sky has been dark
where did the day go
way up into the ass
of the universe
calling it that hasn't helped
where we end
trying to extend it
by some jerking it off
making whatever longer
where we end
is nothing
nothing but our carbon monoxide
- Max Stoltenberg
Distractions and unanswered questions
Asking crushed under the chin
of the lowering face of anger
Mesmerized by pupils
disengaged and slamming fists
upon reveries and investigating
Curiosity deflated
bones to branches
muscles to weeds
the backyard of forgetfulness
She went to the sink as her phone rang and rang towards no response. Sneezing and peeing a little. Something fell down the stairs. She imagined what it might be as a voice mail kicked in. Not available after the beep a box of buttons that said something about providing everyone in the office with instructions involving fucking themselves. Applying pressure with her thumb looking at the drain and wondering about a world down there bereft of light not much darker than her own. Pushing apart a couple of slats in the window blinds coming back to this seeing the children being lined up in the desert under a sky filled with hot air balloons fragile substitutes for the spots on the glass.
"Are you done with that?"
"I've been done with it.
"Then why do you still have it?"
"It's got it's teeth in my wrist."
"So much for being conscious."
"Eyes open eyes closed it's a chore."
"You're just saying that."
"You said it."
"I just did."
"We are being annoying."
"What else is new?"
"What is banging around in the dryer?"
"Whatever was banging around before it was put in the wash."
"Too true."
"Too true is whatever we deny today that seeps back in tomorrow."
"Did you bury the cat?"
"Didn't find much left of it."
"There you go procrastinating again."
"Me? I'm the one remember who found a whisker."
"That's just an expression."
"Paw. I meant paw. Remember when I got dragged by the neighbors and their shopping cart?"
"They weren't neighbors. You said you didn't recognize any of them."
"I didn't, but I did say my memory could be on the fritz again."
"On the fritz."
"And I mentioned when they were done with me and dumped me in that storm drain that I spotted the paw? And the following day I asked you about the funeral? Do you recall what you said?"
"Something about more blood in my stools I imagine."
"There was that, yes, but I asked when we were going to dispose of bury the paw and you said you needed several weeks to work on a eulogy. It's been a tad beyond the several weeks."
"On the fritz, eh?"
"On the fritz."
"Are you done with that?"
- Max Stoltenberg
