Sunday, September 21, 2014

TILTING AT EMPTY DRUMS

A man sits at his abyss and hangs his arms down around the outside of his legs thinking of depressing prior events that crash landed him on the roof of the lies that spread out into the parting of company and flat buildings obstacles to suicide obstacles.  That is all to be known you can insist on the underneath what lies underneath lies lies that spread out into the parting of company and flat buildings obstacles to suicide obstacles that is all to be known you can insist on the underneath what lies underneath a layer of fat sandwiching thick slices of repetition and the monotony of doing what you're told and now grown up having done having been done with all that telling them to do what they're told their faces and the flat buildings keeping a man sitting at his abyss and hanging his arms down around the outside of his legs thinking of depressing prior events that hang about as he hangs in there hanging in there.

Haven't been here in a while have been here all the while off and off about going off and someone went off a while back in a while all the while haven't been here in a while have been here all the while off and off about going off and there it is there it is not someone is not someone went off a while back and here here for now is here for now once again determined to speak through these tusks sticking through this bloody head haven't been here in a while have been here all the while but for now looking down at the floor the ground underneath the floor pulled it up and peeled it away characteristic by characteristic a nanny once said to me tried to say to me what she preferred who she preferred and she couldn't bring herself to tell me because she was too ashamed have only seen nothing but those uncomfortable smiles ever since when someone can bring one of those as far up as the layers of fat as far up as the food that wants to escape from digestion the thoughts that want to escape from digestion nursery rhymes step with wooden knees stuck in stubborn and bent phrasing stuck that way their way of being digested or claim they want to be and can never be as far up as the food that wants to escape from as far as the eye can deflate itself into a squint.

I went outside and they went in
I went inside and they went out
No water for tough pills to swallow
See a face only upside down
not in a spoon
plenty of emptiness
too much room
no utensils

"She face-planted," he said as the person he was telling the story to walked into the back wall of the office.  "Oof!" Lemp exclaimed as he staggered back after smashing mostly his nostrils and some of his upper lip having knocked down the last remaining human resources poster. It fell on the carpet where the rip in its threads made when someone fucked with the refrigerator. "Who fucked with the refrigerator?" Biltong had asked in that vague accusing tone while standing next to the printer with curled up papers jamming under one of the corpulent training manuals (think it was labeled 8 of 11) that had been dumped on top of it. 

"He face-planted," she said as the person she was telling the story to walked into the back wall of the office.  "Crap!" Thram exclaimed as he staggered back after smashing mostly his nostrils and some of his upper lip having knocked down the list of birthdays that had been consolidated from a by month list to just a list for the year.

"Did you say oof?" asked Ducko opening the bottom right drawer of his desk looking for the citalopram and finding only coffee grounds and some white-out.  "I did," said Biltong in that abstract contingent tone munching on the crumbs of pill and brushing his beard to dispose of any incriminating evidence. "Even though it sounded like crap," added Biltong. "Can't help sounding like that when you walk face first into a wall," said Ducko thinking about the woman he collided with after refusing the need for directions to a brothel while commenting, "I know where I'm going."

"This cup is gross," declared Hurley biting the underside of her ring finger fingernail to get at the peanut butter she had dug out from behind where her braces and lower teeth met.  "I use it to brush my teeth after lunch," answered Lemp thinking of the depressions in the man's face he saw waiting for the bus not this morning but the morning before.  "I saw you brush your teeth around 2 yesterday," chimed in Prankman looking up from saving her work again and missing out on another opportunity to undo more screwed up column data sorting.  "That was my post-lunch snack - usually a mini-mammoth coffee cake brimplet or a brain-puncher," said Lemp adding, "not this morning," looking at the stain on Hurley's blouse that refused to come out in her laundry.  "What's not this morning?" asked Hurley worrying about missing a meeting when they had just had one that morning.  "I saw you brush your teeth around 4 two days ago," chimed in Gash letting out a quiet long slow rancid fart the culmination of eating the same shit everyday, the rotting of his internal organs, scheduled random burns of the pubic fields around his butt-hole, and his involuntary participation in scientific experiments.  "We have got to talk to maintenance about that horrid gas leak in this building," barked Hurley staring at Gash who wasn't quite finished.  "I have an appetizer before I go home to have dinner - usually a coffee candy," said Lemp asking, "what're they called?"  "Pips?" suggested Gash smirking.  "No, they are not called pips," said Lemp scanning the office to see who else was surfing.  "Isn't that a growth on a bird's tongue?" asked Hurley looking at her cellphone.  "Did you look that up on your phone?" asked Gash just about finished. Hurley continued thumbing and said, "No, I'm calling Nest a dumb-ass for going out with that jerk from security. What's his name?" 

"I thought we didn't have any security anymore," said Biltong looking out the window at some strange shaped objects in the desert unsuccessfully trying to convince himself they were a mirage.  "They hired one back after the roach coach got stolen," said Hurley realizing she had typed two p's. "Why doesn't he stay retired?" asked Ducko rotating his mug to the appropriate position after spilling on his crotch. "He gets bored," Thram said turning off his game of solitaire before anyone else noticed not noticing that Ducko had noticed. "Pee pee," laughed Gash. "Do you mind?" said Hurley thumbing the word shithead into her cellphone.

"I think he quit," said Biltong.
"The security guy?" asked Hurley.
"Well, him, too, but I was referring to the last guy they had left in maintenance," said Biltong.
"What the hell?!" exclaimed Hurley.
"Do you mean this or your text?" asked Gash.
"Both," muttered Hurley.
"She means neither," said Thram.
"I mean both and neither," said Hurley.
"That sounds like the horseshit from the morning meeting," said Ducko.
"What was that ass-fuck's name from security?" asked Hurley.
"She's changing the subject," said Ducko.
"I am not and you're afraid to open up to a new experience and enrich your stifled inner life," said Hurley.
"I don't know, but he had a horrible posture like Alkaline," said Thram.
"There is nothing new about this experience and my inner life what's left of it smolders from opening up to this breeding ground for parasites," said Ducko.
"Alkaline was his influence, but he couldn't get the demeanor down right," said Gash.
"Did she have to face-plant?" asked Lemp.
"Alkaline reminded me of Zorm," said Thram.
"Yeah, Zorm," said Prankman sneezing.
"Ass-fuck actually thought that was a cool way to carry himself," said Hurley.
"Why don't you tell me another anecdote where someone doesn't face-plant?" asked Lemp.
"Zorm is where he got the influence for that telling throat clearing," said Thram.
"So nothing's going to be done for the stench in this building now?" said Hurley.
"What do I type in on this screen?" asked Prankman pointing at her monitor and looking at Hurley.
"You act as if all I have are face-planting anecdotes," said Ducko.
"We're all plumbing conduits for the waste of the world to pass through on its way to the ocean," said Gash feeling like he might begin again.
"I have a nice piece of misinformation," said Biltong hunching over in his chair.
"You're doing it the right way if you're getting the same error message as me," said Hurley to Prankman while continuing to pump her thumbs into her cellphone completing the sentence it's your funeral.
"I'm just requesting a different anecdote that's all," said Lemp.
"I never thought Alkaline's throat clearing was telling," said Prankman.
"I doubt anything makes it to the ocean from here," said Hurley.
"I'll have more anecdotes after they decide if they want to go through with this merger or not," said Ducko.
"Zorm's influence was Monocle and that sigh so heavy with bewilderment and contempt," said Thram.
"Does anyone know why he has to start his anecdote over after someone decides on the merger?" Lemp asked everyone in the office.
"You and your doubt," said Prankman.
"Am I the only one who gets that feeling like they're that tiny silver ball in one of those little kid's plastic toy puzzles and someone big is about to tear the lid off again and make it fall into place?" asked Gash.
"Me and my doubt. It was an arranged marriage," said Hurley setting her thumbs in motion again to write the text of her apology.

A man sits at his abyss and hangs his arms down around the outside of his legs thinking of depressing prior events that crash landed him on the roof of the lies that spread out into the parting of company and flat buildings obstacles to suicide obstacles.  That is all to be known you can insist on the underneath what lies underneath lies lies that spread out into the parting of company and flat buildings obstacles to suicide obstacles that is all to be known you can insist on the underneath what lies underneath a layer of fat sandwiching thick slices of repetition and the monotony of doing what you're told and now grown up having done having been done with all that telling them to do what they're told their faces and the flat buildings keeping a man sitting at his abyss and hanging his arms down around the outside of his legs thinking of depressing prior events that hang about as he hangs in there hanging in there.


- Max Stoltenberg